The Road To My Atheism...

...is a rather short road. I never regularly attended church services, despite being raised in a Southern Baptist family. Sure, I'd go for weddings and funerals and the like, but never for Sunday services. I even went to a Catholic church in Upstate New York once, but only as an observer, as my atheism at the time was starting to take root. All I could remember about that particular sermon was it had to do with serpents (Reptilians, perhaps?).  I was 21.


I have a vague recollection of attending Vacation Bible School at the age of 8 with a pair of brothers who were friends of mine, and my own brother went along too. He only lasted two days while I went the whole week. The only thing I could remember, because keep in mind this was nearly twenty years ago, was that I did a lot of coloring and arts and crafts. I'd say 75% of that involved Jesus. My mom tells me that the only reason I even agreed to go to VBS was because I had a crush on my friends' mom. Yeah, she was pretty, but an 8-year-old boy has no concept of love or romance. Funny, because at that age, I became aware of the existence of homosexuals. That, however, is another topic for another time. Moving on...


Let me tell you about dreams. With regards to religion, I had several significant dreams over the course of seven years, beginning with two big ones at age 9. The first dream had to do with me dying and "ascending to heaven". I just remember a bright light and a never-ending staircase as I floated on high. I woke up and tried to go to school the next day, but that dream scared me so bad that I had to go home. Really, I was so fragile at the time, that I would cry about anything. Maybe I cried because I knew I was headed down a dark and turbulent road that would carry on for the next nine years. As I approached my tenth birthday, I had yet another big dream. This dream was the first of a three-parter, so you know it's gonna be good! 


Part One: My Dance With the Devil--
This first dream I had involved me fighting off skeleton warriors in my backyard as flames shot up from the ground. At the end of this dream, I caught a glimpse of what my mind perceived Satan to look like. I guess you could say that this was a representation of all the conflicts I was involved in during my waking life. I got into a lot of fights starting at this age. VERY METAL!!!!! 


Part Two: The Fight Continues--
This dream, I had at age 13. I'm still battling the skeleton hordes as I descend into hell. With all conquered, I began fighting Lucifer himself. The dream (battle) ends in a stalemate. This dream represents the ongoing struggle for acceptance in an increasingly intolerable environment. MORE METAL!


Part Three: A Dangerous Turn of Events--
Age 16 was when this final part in the series of dreams occurred. Realizing that my fight with The Horned One was a losing battle, I began to have many doubts before finally deciding to join the side of evil. This dream was a representation of how I was beginning to accept my impatient, short-fused attitude for what it was. I figured "Why try to change now? It won't do me a bit of good.". This was also when I began to have questions, specifically of what I had been dreaming about. ABSOLUTELY METAL!!!!


As I entered into adulthood, my doubts about religious faith began to surface even more. Anywhere I worked, those who were hostile towards me, may have been so because I was not very religious. But, what could I expect, working as a WHITE man in largely Black and Hispanic communities? It was after I had been in my first serious relationship with a girl that I changed from being an agnostic conservative to full-on atheist liberal. I was 21, going on 22. Throughout my life, I have had plenty of girls who have told me that they could not date a man who was not religious or had no faith in god. Those whores meant nothing to me then, and they sure don't mean anything to me now. To this day, I'm still finding out that everything I was told to believe that was supposedly good about Christianity is wrong. Something new everyday.


Many people in my family have trouble dealing with the fact that I am an atheist, and very proud of it. I wish I could change their perception of me, but I know that I can't. So, I guess they can just go on living their sad delusion, hoping for a great reward after death. Hey, at least I'm not trying to shove my atheism in their faces anymore. They should at least be happy about that.


Wow! This blog turned out to be longer than I thought it would be. I really am finished telling this story, so thanks for reading!

Intro

I've been a member of so many blogging websites, that this is nothing new to me. However, I actually want to try and keep this one up. 


Oh, I'm sorry...I seem to have forgotten to introduce myself. My name is James Thomas Colley, of Orlando, Florida. Now, with that out of the way, I want to tell you why I have created this blog. 


I have created a blog here to express ideas, rant, and challenge other viewpoints. Will I get a lot of hits? That depends on how often I let people know about this blog. It certainly can't hurt to spread the word, could it? I didn't think so! 


Alright, so I'm gonna stop rambling and get to the end. As I write more blogs, you will get to know me and what I'm all about. Until next time, America! (in Maury Povich voice)